For many, family and friends can help out. If this isn’t the case – hiring a babysitter is another option. But that’s not the case for everyone.
For some families, including my own, it isn’t as simple as ‘hiring a babysitter’. My child has very high needs and she deserves parents who are not burnt out. We need breaks but can’t just hire a sitter. We need someone trained to provide good care of our child.
The change in rules on what people can use their Carer Support (CS) and/or IF respite funding on has thrown a huge spanner in the works for many parents and families who provide care for a disabled person.
In accordance with the new rules, these are some ideas of how you can use your Carer support or IF respite funding:
- Contribution to the costs of substitute caring whilst the full-time carer takes a break (including wages etc)
- Expenses that are a necessary part of supporting the disabled person while the full-time carer takes a break
- One-off purchases of:
- tablet devices;
- noise-cancelling headphones;
- Sensory items (e.g., fidget spinners etc.); and
- weighted blankets
There are a few things you can do to help yourself have some respite. If you still feel you need to keep an eye on your child at the same here are some ideas of things you can do.
- Listen to your favourite music (through headphones if you’re worried about noise).
- Take some time to enjoy a hobby (e.g., crafting, knitting, painting, writing, etc). Especially if it’s something you can quickly put down.
- Journaling. This can help get your thoughts out and down on paper and may help you to feel less stressed.
- Deep breathing. Even 3mins of deep breathing and controlled breaths can help you to feel like you’ve had a mini-break. Box breathing is another breathing technique that works.
- If your child is a good sleeper, consider staying up for an extra 30mins or getting up 30mins earlier to give yourself that extra bit of ‘me-time’ when the house is quiet and you can be on your own.
If you have a trusted friend or family member who can spend a bit of time with your child, here are some other free ideas of taking a break.
- Find time to get outside and have some fresh air. Even just 5-10mins of fresh air and deep breathing can make a huge difference. If you have longer, consider going for a bush walk or along a beach.
- Have a small sleep in / take a nap
- Have a bath or a long soak in the shower.
- Read a chapter of a good book.
- Spend time on your hobbies
It can be a hard road raising a child with extra needs that not everyone understands. We as carers need to ensure we take breaks. It can be difficult for some people to ask for help but for our own wellbeing and that of our children it is beneficial to do so. The reality is that we can’t do it all on our own and we need breaks from caring. So reach out to trusted family and friends. You might be pleasantly surprised on who steps up to help out.
If you need help reaching out, let our Parent Liaison Rosemary know (email: rosemary@pvi.org.nz) and she will do her best to put you in touch with someone who may be able to help.
